Featured on Rewire: Your Guide to Living on Your Own After a Breakup
AGP Psychotherapist, Alysha Perlman, shares insight on living alone and moving on after a breakup.
Breaking up feels different for everyone. But when the breakup is with a live-in, long-term partner, there can be an extra void. | Credit: Adobe
Not overdoing it is key. Because while your friends can be the support system you need post-breakup, you also need time to work through what you're feeling. "It can feel empty, but it is important to not distract from the feeling in order to move forward," said Alysha Perlman, a New York City-based licensed psychotherapist.
"I often tell clients it is important to 'feel your feels' so you can pay attention to what you're feeling, accept the feeling, and determine what this means to you now."
Sitting with that empty, lonely feeling is the only way you're going to be able to move past it. Don't distract yourself so much that you become numb to your emotions.
It can be tempting, too, to jump into a new relationship right away to get over these feelings. But distraction only covers up your grief.
"Without allowing yourself time to grieve you are not able to grieve the past relationship and learn what you need going forward," Perlman said.
"Take time for yourself, remember what you enjoyed before the relationship or things you may have put to the side while you were in the relationship and explore what makes you happy."
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