Moving Forward Post-Election

Nov 18

With the news last Saturday that former Vice President Joe Biden has been elected our 46th President, there is a range of emotions that we’ve all experienced over the last two weeks.

Personally, Saturday felt like the first bright moment we’ve had in months. In typical New York City fashion, I found out that Biden had won because all of my neighbors started screaming, and without seeing the news yet, I just knew. Walking out in NYC throughout the day, the energy was electric. Every car that passed by honked along with the crowds of people spilling onto the street crying and cheering for this win.

And while that day brought an extreme amount of joy, the days that have followed have felt a bit strange. Maybe you’re feeling it too.

I’m sure I’m not alone in the amount of sleep lost during the week of the election. No matter what our views are, this election and everything it brings up has taken more of a toll on your mental health than you realize.

For many of us, it feels as though we have been stuck in an abusive relationship for four years, and have just experienced the first wave of freedom that it is ending. For some of you, that abuse has felt much deeper, threatening your very existence.

We’ve collectively experienced this trauma together as a country. We have marched in the streets together, we have felt the abuse of our current president’s words in one way or another, we have educated one another, we have supported, cared for, and laughed with each other even in the darkest of times.

Collective trauma can feel both comforting that you are not alone during a hard time, however, it has the potential to make you feel shame if you feel that your trauma isn’t as deep as others (i.e maybe our current presidents words on race or sexual identity does not affect your personal existence so you feel like you shouldn’t complain). Brené Brown spoke on this in her podcast at the beginning of the pandemic. She said, “Let’s stop ranking suffering. There is enough love and empathy to go around. Putting ourselves down because we’re struggling, but have it so much better than others right now can kill our empathy for others.”. So while you struggle to understand how to deal with the last four years and what they mean for you and your community moving forward, remember to go easy on yourself.

You may be asking yourself, what now? What will our current president do next until Biden takes office? What do we do with all of these emotions? Is it okay to feel hopeful now? Will anything actually change?

Those are all valid thoughts, and you are not alone in navigating them and life in general after this election.

It may be confusing to have so much emotion over a political moment in our country. First, I want to say that no emotion is ‘bad’. All of our emotions serve a purpose for us, and whatever it is that you are feeling at this moment is valid. Second, I want to remind you that for four years you may have experienced being gaslit, emotionally beat up and in some cases this person in power telling you and the rest of the country that you don’t matter. Do not discount what that does to your mental health. If you are someone who doesn’t understand why this win is so emotional, look beyond how this election win affects just you and your inner circle.

So, what do you do now?

Cry. Scream. Laugh. Write it out. Find things that bring you relaxation and joy to replace the time you have given to the election. I strongly encourage you to lean on your community right now. You do not have to walk through this experience by yourself. Collectively, there is still work to be done. If taking action in your community is something that brings you meaning and purpose, go for it. Much of the anxiety that has come with this pandemic and election is the loss of control we feel. Taking back some of that control through activism work may ease the feelings of uncertainty you are experiencing.

Take it all one day at a time, and most importantly, give yourself permission to feel it all.

Colleen